If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
