from now on my penis is your penis
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Randomize
