i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
We are all done wearing pants today
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize