Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
