Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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