Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
