This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
