he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
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