apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Randomize