I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
