stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
