fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Randomize