butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Randomize
