You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
