Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
You did what with his pubic hair?
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
