She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Randomize
