Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
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