sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
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