i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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