her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
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