i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
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