I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
