It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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