i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Randomize
