Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
