My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
