I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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