Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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