yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Randomize