But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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