I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Randomize
