He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
I showed him my bush... on skype.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Randomize
