I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Randomize
