Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Randomize
