in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
