Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
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