Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
