just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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