haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
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It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
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