my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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