Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Randomize
