I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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