So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
