This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
