at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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