woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Randomize
