oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
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