My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Randomize
