high people should be assigned attendants
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
Randomize
