I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
